I Can't Really Complain . . . But I Still Do
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Location: Colorado

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

Super Fantastic Caption Contest (#26)

Well, Christmas is officially over and you are now on the clock with only 364 shopping days remaining until we do it all over again.

Seeing as how absolutely zero people are going to be checking the blog this week, I figure we might as well at least act like it's business as usual . . .

(Management likes it when it looks like we're busy doing something around here.)

I think this week's picture is pretty good,

What do you think?

Ben O.

Friday, December 22, 2006

5 Little Known Things About Me

Okay people, we got tagged again . . .

This time Mark, who runs What a Savage got wants to know "5 Little Known Things About Me" . . .

Sure enough, here goes (In no particular order) -

1. I've never been to Alaska. Go figure!

2. I do not like tea. I have tried forever, because of the health benefits, to learn to like tea and it still just tastes like dirty water to me. Why would anyone ever waste an opportunity to drink something good like beer or soda on a tall glass of . . . tea?

(Sorry in advance to all tea-lovers.)

3. I haven't ridden a roller-coaster in 10 years. I'm not scared or anything, I just haven't been to any amusement parks in a really long time. It's actually starting to suck. I need to go ride some freakin' rides this Summer.

4. I have a live, in-concert Air Supply song on my iPod. Yes, Air Supply has actually been known to play concerts from time to time.

5. This one may ruffle a few red-and-black-clad feathers, but I actually like Halloween more than Christmas. Not by much, but I just love the spookiness of Halloween. I guess it's a flaw in my character. Don't get me wrong, Christmas is totally awesome and I understand it has a much, much deeper meaning and significance. I just like the overall feel that surrounds Halloween a little bit more.

Ben O.

Monday, December 18, 2006

Mind the Gap

Evil Twin Biff (On Holiday in the UK)

Friday, December 15, 2006

Feedback Friday (#52)

Okay, here's one for ya . . .

Today, against the wishes of all but one of the fan-mail letters we recieved this past week, we're gonna get a lil' bit nostalgic. It is the Holiday Season after all.

We want to know all about the best Christmas present you have ever received.

That's the assignment.

Maybe it was the "Starsky & Hutch" metal lunch box you got in the 3rd grade and were so attached to that you would even have it under your pillow at night when you went to sleep. It could be that double-cassette copy of Neil Diamond's Greatest Hits that you can still sing every single word to. It might even be your very first pair of Green Lantern Super-Hero underoos.

You know the ones I'm talkin' about . . .

Well, here's your chance to tell us all about it.

I can't wait to read those comments -

Ben O.

Thursday, December 14, 2006

2nd Annual Lurker Appreciation Day

Guess what today is . . .

No, it's not "Shave the Yak Day".

No, it's not "Pet Your Local Lunchlady Day".

And, no . . . it's most certainly not "Rubber Hose Beatdown Day". That was last Tuesday.

Heck no!

It's The 2nd Annual Lurker Appreciation Day!

Don't believe me? Check this out.

Now, you're all saying to yourselves "Okay, it's Lurker Appreciation Day. Big freakin' whooptie do. So what does that mean in the Real World?"

Well, I'm about to tell you.

This is the one day a year when we pay homage to all those people who read the blog but never leave any comments. And the best part is that we do it "Procrastination Station Style".

So, here's what we're gonna do . . .

Everyone who is reading this (if you have ever left a comment or not - and especially if you haven't), leave a comment with the word "Bullwinkle" in it.

It's that simple - no wit involved. No need to fashion the perfect statement that embodies all that you believe in and hope for. Nothing so involved.

Just one word.

And a good word at that. When was the last time someone asked you to say the word "Bullwinkle" anyway? It's fun . . . try it.

I look forward to paying my deepest and most sincere respects to each and every Lurker out there.

Today is your day.

Make the most out of it.

Ben O.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Into The Hideous Vortex We Shall Go

Okay people,

Today you're in for a real treat. We have a lil' something special that was delivered to my email box this morning from my beloved younger brother - Brother O.

Once you view it(and please, please view it . . . it's a tad long, but you simply must see this.), you will understand why I am now going to have to block him from ever sending me any more emails for the rest of eternity.

Sorry dude!

I've decided to include the text of his accompanying message, since I couldn't write anything better to describe what you are about to witness . . .

"If you took everything cool about Star Wars and reversed it, so you had a massive black hole of suck, this would live at its core . . ."


Ben O. (with guest writer - Brother O.)

Any and all complaints can (and should) be mailed directly to my brother. He's got plenty of time on his hands now and just loves reading "hate" email all day.

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

The Song of The Week (#5)

"Merry Christmas, Charlie Brown!"

Ben O.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

The Best Goal Ever

Okay people,

I'm not the biggest Soccer (aka Football) fan on the planet. I like it, don't get me wrong. But, not living in a place where it is king, I naturally get lazy and watch the sports the US is good at.

No harm, no foul.

But, today I want to pay tribute to what has to be the coolest free-kick Soccer goal ever scored. Ronaldinho (Probably the best player in the world, if not as quite hunky as David Beckham.) sets up the defenders so they think he is going to kick hard and high. The best part is that when they jump up in reaction to what they think he is going to do, he has already beaten them, as the ball simply rolls innocently under their feet.

You have got to see this . . .


I told you it was cool.

Ben O.

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Super Fantastic Caption Contest (#25)

Okay people, here's a question for ya . . .

You know the song "The 12 Days of Christmas"?

Of course, we've all heard it at least 37,982 times . . . this year.

Well, here's my question - How many of each item does the dude get after it's all said and done?

Does UPS deliver a shiny, new pear tree (complete with partridge) each and every day for just under two weeks? Or, does he just get one lonely tree? Is it cumulative or are these single-shot-one-time-only offers extended from the true love? For that matter, if a pear tree (with a partridge in it) falls in an empty mall parking lot the day after Thanksgiving, does it make a sound?

Don't answer that!

I'm just curious, that's all. Seems like an awful lot of lords a' leaping.

If you came here today looking for a caption contest and are starting to wonder, have no fear.

This week's photo is actually a pretty good one.

I look forward to your comments . . .

Ben O.

The Song of The Week (#4)

Ben O.

Friday, December 01, 2006

Feedback Friday (#51)

Okay people, here's one for ya . . .

It's Friday and December has managed to sneak it's way in the front door. I say bring it on - snow can be a good thing. And hey, Christmas isn't all that far away now (Current marketing campaigns across America would have you believe that there are only a handful of minutes remaining to shop this year.)

Unfortunately, we here at Procrastination Station have some bad news to deliver - due to budgetary (and sanitary) concerns, we have had to let go of Milo Sturnwalter, the late-night intern.

(We had an intern!?!)

Now I know this may cause some loyal readers to question what, if anything, there is left to live for. Take a deep breath. First of all, let me be the first to assure everyone that this will in no way affect the quality of content presented on this blog. In fact, as a reader, you shouldn't notice any lapses in material at all. You can still count on a full calendar of daily ramblings as well as a whole host of fun and exciting scheduled events (that will still actually happen two to three days after they were advertised.)

Not to worry . . . we didn't make it all the way to this comfortable level of mediocrity simply by falling asleep at the wheel and leaving those who matter most hanging out to dry.

Heck no!

So on that note, let's get down to the matter at hand . . .

It's "Feedback Friday" after all, and I think we have a pretty nifty question this week.

What is your LEAST favorite Christmas song?

That's it . . . that's the assignment.

Tell us all about that song that just makes you want to buy a ball peen hammer and start smashing the windows out of every car in the mall parking lot every time you hear it.

And, for your information, this doesn't necessarily have to be a song sung by scarf-clad chipmunks or holly flashing weasels either. There are plenty of perfectly crappy Christmas songs out there performed by otherwise legitimate (or somewhat-less-than-legitimate) human artists.

This should be a particularly fun one . . .

Ben O.

BTW - There's a nice lil' chain of really funny captions going down for this week's Super Fantastic Caption Contest. If you haven't jumped in yet, surf on down and leave a comment.