Feedback Friday (#78)

Okay, here's one for ya . . .

So, it's Sunday and I'm checking out the ads that come bundled in my Sunday Paper. There's all the usual stuff, but one thing hit me as really telling of where we are as a society here in America.

There's a point, so hang in there.

Apparently, there's a new Aerosmith version of the overwhelmingly popular Guitar Hero video game. Hey, I love playing guitar and I even like Aerosmith a little (Their older stuff), but admittedly - I haven't played the game yet.

I know, I know. I've already been told that it's the coolest game ever and I need to venture out of my cave and give it a try. Send me a signed cashier's check for the purchase price and I promise I will.

So, back to the events at hand on Sunday.

I'm flipping through the paper and one of the ads for Aerosmith's Greatest Hits on CD at the new mega-store, "Best Circuit Warehouse City", actually said this -

"Contains songs heard in Guitar Hero"

What!?!

Did I miss something? The CD that has been out since before CDs were invented, has songs contained on it that are from the video game that is younger than my flim?

Am I reading this correctly?

It was in that very moment that I new I was old.

And . . . if you are still reading this, odds are that you are old too.

So, for today's assignment - let's hear all about the goofiest thing you've seen lately come out of our "Miley Cyrus is cool and Pink Floyd is gone" culture. What headline or advertisement out there makes you feel old or out of touch?

This should be interesting.

Ben O.

Super Fantastic Caption Contest (#56)

Okay, this week's picture is burning a hole in my hard drive.

I better skip the pleasantries and just toss it up here for you to comment upon.



I warned you.

I warned you all.


Can't wait to read those captions -

Ben O.

Feedback Friday (#77)

Okay, it's that time again.

The best day of the week, IMHO.

So, I'm watching the most craptastic movie of the season thus far, "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of Space Aliens and a Bunch of Other Cheesy Sillyness" and it occurred to me that I just threw away $9.75.

I almost started crying. Not at how tender the reunion scene is between our beloved hero Indy and his first, true love Marion. No, that was beyond lame. I was tearing up at how long I had worked to earn the money I spent purchasing the ticket for that crap-fest.

Here's something else - Cate Blanchett (who I normally actually like in films) was so unbelievably terrible. I was embarrassed for her and her family and her pets and her first grade teacher. I think we should have a system whereby actors who win academy awards, but then come out and lay steamy turds on screen . . . should have to give up their Oscars.

Sound fair?

I thought so -

Where am I going with all of this?

I'm going right here -

This week's assignment is for you to tell us all about your nominee for the First Annual "Okay, that portrayal sucked the big one, now hand your previously won oscar back over . . . pronto" Award.

It's simple, really. Just pick an academy award winning actor or actress who you think stunk up the screen in a film they were in after having won their award.

What is it about actors - they win the dang thing and then suddenly think they can speak every accent fluently and are God's gift to the silver screen?

Anyway, this should be fun.

I'm so looking forward to reading your comments.


Ben O.

Biff Has Been Found!

Well, it's finally over.

The nightmare can stop.

We found Evil Twin Biff (See post below).

But, if you still feel like guessing where he is (even though we already know), by all means, knock yourself out.

The Management

Feedback Monday (#76)

Okay, a few weeks back I told you about the strange disappearance of Evil Twin Biff. Well, here we are today and he still hasn't been heard from. His desk remains as unusually clean as the day we discovered he had a desk. His parking spot has, for the past month, been inhabited by this strange little man with a hot dog and gyro stand. And, even though we figured it for a longshot, he has yet to return to his favorite new restaurant, that new Star Wars themed Asian restaurant that he loves so much - "Padmei Thai".

It's like he just vanished. Walked out into the cornfields never to be seen or heard from again.

Until that is, this morning . . .

I have in my hot little hand a veritable beacon of hope amidst the bleak and desperate vortex of insanity revolving around Evil Twin Biff's inexplicable disappearance.

It's a note.

From Biff.

Written in what appears to be either chocolate fudge or something infinitely less exciting than chocolate fudge. I know the anticipation is palpable, so I won't prolong the agony any further.

Here's what it says -

"Gone Walkabout. Took the laptop and the petty cash. Guess where I am. No, really - Guess."

It goes on to say -

"It'll be fun. Everyone loves a riddle. A puzzle. And this will be the biggest mystery to hit the internet since the confounding popularity of Facebook.

So, with that I bid you farewell. At least until somebody guesses where I am.

Forever Yours - Biff

P.S. I had nothing to do with that unfortunate "Little Bo Peep" incident in Wichita that the news has begun reporting about. Honest, I wasn't even in Kansas."

So, the rest of this post is merely academic.

Today's assignment is as straight forward as they come.

Guess where Evil Twin Biff is. It's that simple. Together we can find him . . . I believe it in my heart of hearts.

Thanks for all your help -


Ben O. (on behalf of the Management)

Super Fantastic Caption Contest (#55)

Okay people, it's that time again.

The unpaid intern is literally drowning down in the Procrastination Station sub-basement under the mountains and mountains of letters that we've gotten over the past two days inquiring about whether or not we have any pictures of cars with unusually large missles strapped on them.

You want it, you got it -



I can't wait to read all of your wonderful captions . . .

Ben O.

372,824 Accountants Agree

Top Ten things that Procrastination Station advises not to say to your Financial Advisor this tax season -

1. "Should I use my real name or what they called me in prison?"

2. "Does cashing out my 401K and taking an all-inclusive Alaskan Cruise count as an early withdrawal?"

3. "I'm thinking about cloning myself so I can have another dependent."

4. "Do you mind if I frisk you and check for any wires or recording devices?"

5. "I have decided to call the money I earn "Shmemcome" instead of "Income" - that way I won't have to report any of it to the IRS."

6. "I thought all I had to do to get an extension was to say "Beatlejuice" three times."

7. "Does the marijuana I'm growing down in the basement qualify me as a farmer?"

8. "I was going to donate that money to charity, but then it occurred to me that I could buy myself an iPod instead and just lie on the tax form."

9. "Come on! Live a little. Move that decimal over a few spaces."

10. "Here, take this box and hide it somewhere. I don't want to know where it is."


Helping the World out, one 1040EZ at a time.

The Management