If I Wasn't Chained To The Desk, I Would Totally Get Up and Walk Right Out The Door
Okay - let's get a few things straight before we go any further . . .
1. Star Wars is cooler than Star Trek.
2. Regardless of what you may have heard, most people react negatively when a spouse says "Your body odor, as foul as it is, is somehow eclipsed by your breath".
3. If you're dead set on throwing something at me, why not make it wadded up $100 bills?
4. It's okay to quit in the middle of doing something as long as you don't leave some guy stranded on a window-cleaner scaffolding 275 feet above the ground.
5. Service in Best Buy's "Geek Squad" does not qualify you for burial in Arlington Cemetery.
6. I don't care what Steve Irwin says, there is no good reason to ever pinch a crocodile's genitals.
7. Time is crueler than Gravity, but Gravity doesn't give a crap.
8. Whatever the reason you have for calling your boss a "Bafoon" to his (or her) face, it isn't going to keep you from getting fired.
9. We as a society simply do not use the word "Bafoon" nearly enough.
-AND-
10. The correct answer to the question "Would you like paper or plastic?", is "Yes".
Ben O.
1. Star Wars is cooler than Star Trek.
2. Regardless of what you may have heard, most people react negatively when a spouse says "Your body odor, as foul as it is, is somehow eclipsed by your breath".
3. If you're dead set on throwing something at me, why not make it wadded up $100 bills?
4. It's okay to quit in the middle of doing something as long as you don't leave some guy stranded on a window-cleaner scaffolding 275 feet above the ground.
5. Service in Best Buy's "Geek Squad" does not qualify you for burial in Arlington Cemetery.
6. I don't care what Steve Irwin says, there is no good reason to ever pinch a crocodile's genitals.
7. Time is crueler than Gravity, but Gravity doesn't give a crap.
8. Whatever the reason you have for calling your boss a "Bafoon" to his (or her) face, it isn't going to keep you from getting fired.
9. We as a society simply do not use the word "Bafoon" nearly enough.
-AND-
10. The correct answer to the question "Would you like paper or plastic?", is "Yes".
Ben O.
posted by Ben O. | 10:00 PM
13 Comments:
LOL! I couldn't agree more!
I think I just found my 10 philosophies for a happy life!
Within an hour of writing this comment, I shall call someone a baffoon.
Hee hee.
I love #10. I have done #10 countless times.
Time may be crueler than Gravity, but Gravity will kill you a hell of a lot faster.
There is no comparison of Star Wars to Star Trek. Have you seen the new Battlestar Galactica on the Sci Fi channel? If you haven't, then rent the first season and give it a whirl. Great drama.
After reading through all of your wonderful comments, I am ashamed to announce that I cannot spell.
Apparently the word I wrote as "Bafoon" is, as everyone knows, spelled "Buffoon".
I guess I have to face the fact that I am one . . . again.
BTW - the form of the word describing a persons actions is actually a funnier word -
"Buffoonery"
I get a little tickled just thinking about it.
Ben O.
Those were good, but this one takes the cake:
It's okay to quit in the middle of doing something as long as you don't leave some guy stranded on a window-cleaner scaffolding 275 feet above the ground.
Yousa no liking Jar Jar? Mesa no liking him either. I think the jury is soundly back on that digitally created turd.
At least he didn't seperate his fingers and say something like "Maysa Yousa Lives Long and Prospersa"
Actually, now that I am picturing it, that would be pretty freakin' cool.
Ben O.
Time is crueler than Gravity, but Gravity doesn't give a crap.
Yeah, but gravity is cooler.
The original 3 Star Wars is cooler then Star Trek. The last 3... eh... not so much. Prettier, sure. But cooler? I don't know.
What I do know is that Farscape & Firely are cooler then both of them. :P
OH, and the new banner looks cool too.
2. Regardless of what you may have heard, most people react negatively when a spouse says "Your body odor, as foul as it is, is somehow eclipsed by your breath".
I read that three times and laughed louder each time.
1. D'uh!
2. See #1
3. You wish
4. Oh, come on! Let a person have some fun!
5. Geeks smell bad.
6. Not even gonna touch it.
7. Wow, man, that's deep.
8. *snicker*
9. I will make an effort to use "Bafoon" at least once a week now.
10. I like to tell them, "neither, I will just pull up the tail of my shirt, and make a pouch to carry everything, thankyouverymuch!"
you have made my day better. thanks.
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