I Can't Really Complain . . . But I Still Do
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Location: Colorado

Saturday, September 24, 2005

Feedback Saturday (#5)

Dude - why is it so hard for me to get my Frito-eating, Shiner Bock-swilling butt off of the velcro couch and post Feedback Friday on an actual Friday?


Okay here we go - for the weekly feedback portion of the ever-increasingly popular Procrastination Station Super-Blog, I want to hear your best joke. That's it. That's what I'm askin' for - a good, relatively-clean joke that is actually funny.

And I know you have a couple . . .

Now, I understand that it might seem completely inappropriate to my rabidly loyal and energetically fanatical reading public out there for this blog to attempt to deal with a subject that is not entirely serious. (3 people are shaking their heads and 2 of them don't even know why.)

So, in a stark departure from the norm . . . I want us all to reach down deep and get seriously funny.

After looking up the word "humor" in my handy-dandy Websters Dictionary, I see that any attempt at being funny can have unforeseen repercussions. Apparently, humor is subjective. What cracks the heck out of one person will only rattle around inside someone else's skull causing them to scratch their head and innocently mutter the phrase "Why would one of them there chickens want to cross the road anyway?"

So with that - I bid you good luck and I leave you with a little joke I've enjoyed telling for some time now . . .

Question - What is the difference between Broccoli and Boogers?
Answer - Kids won't eat Broccoli.

Ben O.


Blogger arkie said...

How do you identify a bald eagle?
All his feathers are combed over to one side.

1:48 PM  
Blogger Colin said...

Somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice.

5:36 AM  
Blogger jenbeauty said...

Why did the elephant have three white feet and one yellow??

He forgot to lift his leg! {Insert} drum beat here!

8:00 AM  
Blogger Ben O. said...

Colin - that reminds me of this dude the other day as I was driving in rush-hour traffic. I pulled over into his lane directly in front of him and he was so nice that he held up one finger to show that he thought I was #1.

I thought it was so sweet.

Ben O.

9:40 AM  
Blogger Scott said...

Sorry, this won't be clean, but it is the best joke I know.

A boy spots the elephant exhibit at the zoo. The elephants' generous extemity is hanging low, and the boy is suprised, never having seen this in any of the picture books. He tugs on his mother's sleeve and asks her what it is.

"That's his trunk," she answers, not really seeing what the boy is pointing to.

"Mom, I know what a trunk is! Look, there, between his legs. What is that."

Her eyes widen in surprise. She says, "Oh, uh, th-that's his, uh..." She thinks for a moment, "It's nothing. Now let's get going." And she hurries towards the next exhibit.

He turns to his father, who has been talking on his cell phone oblivious to the exchange. The boy tugs at his sleeve.

"Dad, what is that hanging between the elephants legs?"

The father says, "Hold on," then squints towards where the boy is pointing. "Ah, well, that's his penis son."

"But mom said it was nothing!"

The father blows on his knuckles and shines them on his shirt. "I've spoiled the bitch."

10:20 AM  
Blogger Ben O. said...

We'll let it slide this one time, Scott. Nice joke. If I had a quarter for all the times I've had the same sort of thing happen to me . . . I would have about 13 cents.

Ben O.

10:31 AM  
Blogger Spinning Girl said...

Why won't cannibals eat clowns?
Because they taste funny.

2:04 PM  
Blogger The Zombieslayer said...

You got Shiner Boch in Colorado now? Hmm...Makes me reconsider where I'm going to build my anti-zombie compound.

11:34 AM  
Blogger Ben O. said...

Hey Zombie - I hate to give away the secret because it is already getting way too crowded, but Colorado totally rocks. More beer brewed here than any other state in the union - awesome Summers and the Winters . . . duh - best skiing in the country.

Ben O.

BTW - Shiner Bock is freely available and highly drinkable.

12:18 PM  
Blogger Kathleen said...

This was my Little Brother's favorite riddle/joke when he was about 5 years old. He got it off a Dixie cup.

What did one hot dog say to the other hot dog?

Hi Frank!

That would crack his shit up EVERY TIME! And I bet it still would today.

11:16 AM  

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