I Can't Really Complain . . . But I Still Do
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Thursday, April 05, 2007

The Geezer Gap

Okay, here's one for ya . . .

Am I the only one having a hard time dealing with the fact that my parents are way cooler and more technologically equipped than I?

(Did I delete that email thinking that it was just another unwanted bit of spam?)

They just completed a 95 year study over in Sweden and I'm not alone in this by a longshot. Apparently, 72% of people my age (wouldn't you like to know . . .) responded in the affirmative when consistently and repetitively questioned "Do you feel as if your parents have sexier technological gadgets than you?" (Of course the staff at Ikea readily admit that the numbers might be a little skewed because they weren't able to chase down and catch everyone in the research/study group.)

The idea here is not to point fingers and lay blame. Oh No. The real aim of this inquiry is to get to the bottom of what we will from here on out call the "Geezer Gap".

Now, let's start out by establishing a baseline. I don't live in a cave. I had an Atari and I knew how to use it. I spent my childhood playing the most uber-cutting edge games available for Commodore 64 AND Super NES. Truth be known, in my heyday, you could have even called me a geek. That's right . . . a geek.

But not now.

Nope.

I'm no longer a dweeb or a nerd or a techie. Now I'm just a doofus.

I think everything began tumbling downhill a few years ago when my beloved Mom showed me her brand-spankin' new cell phone and I realized in horror that it had more memory than my desktop computer.

That ain't right.

Can I get a Witness?

I can still remember the days when my parents would call me to see if I had gotten their email.

Now I love my parents dearly, but we are way too cool to let this go on one mili-second longer. We have got to break out of our collective funk, tuck in our shirts, band together and put an end to the ever-expanding "Geezer Gap" before someone gets hurt.

And while I'm at it . . . would it kill ya to play some freakin' music, MTV? (if I'm not mistaken, the "M" did at least used to stand for "Music", yes?)


Ben O.

7 Comments:

Blogger Glenn said...

Ummm...I'm regressing as I get older.

Can someone tell me how this ATM thingy works?

4:46 PM  
Anonymous rollin said...

Well, Ben, I'm mixed on this one.

On the one hand, my Mom's cell phone is way cooler than mine, and her car has more thing-a-ma-jigs than James Bond's. But she still calls me to ask how to do certain things with wireless networking and her satellite TV. Maybe I just haven't lost as much of my geek-ness since I work in software development. Or maybe she's just humoring me... Wow, that's a scary thought!

4:06 PM  
Blogger bbsgirl said...

Well...I do and don't fit this category. My Mom has nothing cooler than I do...I'm still trying to get her up to speed on things....but, on the other hand...I have more up to date and cool things than my own adult children do...(and I love it).

5:44 AM  
Blogger Ben O. said...

Okay, I have done some extra research on this and apparently it's more of a financial gap. I think it's all the extra money our parents have and all the cool gadgets out there.

I propose a service whereby young, hip dudes (like me) will teach the older generation how to use your Tivos and your phones and your Blackberries and your blueberries for a nominal fee (and use of said cooler than cool objects.)

Sound good?

Ben O.

6:59 AM  
Blogger Sadie Lou said...

I hear ya on MTV. It seems like all their good time slots are filled with reality shows. They do play videos in the very early morning--when you would do anything NOT to hear Lips of an Angel.

8:42 AM  
Blogger tshsmom said...

My parents refuse to own a computer and use Onstar for their cell phone. I had to connect their VCR and DVD player for them. We also bought them a CD player 10 years ago, when they quit making vinyl.
We're still trying to convince them to rent movies. They have NEVER been inside a video rental store!

I FINALLY found a VH1 channel, out of the 40 MTV and VH1 channels, that plays top 40 music!

1:56 PM  
Blogger Kathleen said...

Ah! I'm safe. My mom barely knows how to use her 20-year-old VCR. And she only has a cell phone because her children got tired of her taking an hour to get somewhere that would take normal people 5 minutes. She hates it, but since we also made her get rid of her home phone (she was never home and when she was she refused to make long-distance phone calls on it w/o her calling card), she has to use it. My Grandma is technologically cooler than my mother.

8:26 AM  

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