I Can't Really Complain . . . But I Still Do
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Location: Colorado

Thursday, December 01, 2005

Go Out There And Win One For The Kiffer

The truth is that aliens landed years ago and have already managed to infiltrate most, if not all of the places we frequent on a daily basis. Every single person out there knows someone who just doesn't get it or might not seem to fit in completely. That man or woman who has always been just a tad bit strange. They say the most bizarre things at the most inexplicable times.

Your gut feeling on this was right on . . . 100%, grade A no if's-and's-or-but's about it alien.

That freak who lives below you in your apartment complex and always decides to invite 37 of his best friends over and play his stereo way too loud every Tuesday night at 2:00 AM . . . alien.

That moron who winks at you as you hurriedly and uncomfortably try to get on the elevator every morning before allowing him the opportunity to wink at you yet again . . . alien.

The lilac haired checkout woman at the grocery store who can somehow chew gum, ask you disinterestedly how your day was and whistle the theme to The Dukes of Hazzard simultaneously while calling Ethel over the loudspeaker for another price check on jiffy pop popcorn . . . alien.

That dude who just cut you off in traffic . . . alien.

Heck, while we're at it, why not just zap the whole lot of 'em? Their all freakin' aliens afterall.


Ben O. (Two feet firmly planted on tera firma - for the time being, at least.)


Blogger Sadie Lou said...

Aliens are on the covers of magazines. Penelope Cruz is SO an alien.

11:28 PM  
Blogger anne said...

Oh heaven. Yes. It all makes sense now.

12:23 AM  
Blogger Sherry said...

Are you calling me an alien?

7:25 AM  
Blogger beadinggalinMS said...

Woman who just sat here and wrote down all her fav. past posts for you-alien!
So here you go Ben-O. hey I rhymed LOL :)

Aug.-Clean up in aisle seventeen

Sept.-If I wasnt chained to the desk, I would totally get up and walk right out door. #6 about Steve Irwin was hilarious.

Oct.-There once was a man named Blemis

Nov.-The day after Halloween

9:14 AM  
Blogger NYPinTA said...

Damn. My secret idenity has been revealed. Damn you Ben O!!

11:52 AM  
Blogger Terri said...

Well yes that certainly explains a lot. Man who sits at a PC playing games online all weekend all the while chewing on a toothpick - alien. OMG I married an Alien!

11:54 AM  
Blogger trinamick said...

Tom Cruise - Alien.
OJ Simpson - Not an alien. We just wish he was.
My alcoholic 4th grade teacher who would yell at us until her neck turned red - alien.

1:17 PM  
Blogger Sass said...

Trinatrick that was funny. Katie Holmes is definatly an alien too.

I met 5 or 6 at the bar last night as well.

2:21 PM  
Blogger Teri said...

Well, that explains the neighbors...

3:02 PM  
Blogger The Zombieslayer said...

Aliens? Now, let's see. Who is an alien? I really wish I could borrow a pair of glasses from Rowdy Roddy Piper, that would make it so much easier.

7:04 PM  
Blogger Lingo Slinger said...

I think I might be an alien... I've cut off many a car, and I am often spinnin' the tracks after 2am with 37 of my closest (alien) friends. Hell, i'm the DJ, so that must make me "The Leader" right?!


I do have a normal shaped skull though... I think.

8:44 PM  
Blogger mysterious in blue said...

that explains a lot! now that you mention it, i know quite a few aliens :).

9:12 PM  

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