I Can't Really Complain . . . But I Still Do
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Location: Colorado

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

There's Never a Davenport Around When You Need One

Okay, here's a couple for ya . . .

1. Never put off until tomorrow that which you've already managed to forget.

2. There is no sound quite like the sound of a life preserver hitting the water 14 miles off-shore.

3. When it's all said and done, it comes down to which flavor of ice cream you prefer - Chocolate or Vanilla.

4. Chocolate is better.

5. That guy who said "Stop and smell the roses" never spent an hour in an enclosed space with Evil Twin Biff after all-you-can-eat burritos at Taco Cabana.

6. When faced with the decision between getting shot in the face or the heart, don't over analyze.

7. Davenport went missing two days ago . . . has anyone seen or heard from him?

8. If you can remember the last time you were asked to put down the rubber hose and slowly step away, then you might want to consider some professional help.

9. There are no more free "Take this job and shove it" glow-in-the-dark boxers. Sorry.

10. Where the heck is my rubber hose?

Until next time . . .

Ben O.

(BTW - Don't forget to click the Audiozue button if ya haven't already. Thanks!)


Blogger scrunch said...

Sorta refering to an earlier post, but I think your humor is 'slicker than scum off a Lousiana swamp'...Keep bloggin' please.

11:14 PM  
Blogger Ben O. said...

Will do Scrunch, at least until the little people stage a riot.

(Back in your cages, little people!)

Ben O.

11:24 PM  
Blogger greatwhitebear said...

LOL.. very funny stuff!

7:26 AM  
Blogger Sadie Lou said...

Vanilla is better. Chocolate gives me phlem. Wait, how do you spell that nasty word anyways?
There's a "g" in there somewhere, right?
Anyways, you can't make rootbeer floats with chocolate ice cream, silly.

8:55 AM  
Blogger Ben O. said...

Bear - Thanks!

Sadie - Back in your cage . . .

I actually like both, but hey . . . the structure of the humor seemed to require that I pick one. What are ya gonna do? I'm a slave to the funny-stuff.

Ben O.

10:07 AM  
Blogger StringMan said...

The life preserver one hits the mark. Chocolate is absolutely better. Funny stuff Ben. Wise, too.

6:59 PM  
Blogger Lingo Slinger said...

Chocolate is indeed better, and I'd get shot in the face over the heart any day... Nobody likes a broken heart.

Hope all is well Ben-O

5:46 PM  
Blogger LiVEwiRe said...

I identify way too closely with numbers 1 and 8... is this a bad thing? =)

2:22 PM  

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