Groundhog Day

Well, Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow this morning. I guess that means we're in for six more weeks of wondering why we devote an entire day to an overgrown rodent and his shadow.

Now I'm no expert on how the sun affects each and every species of vermin differently, but wouldn't it be cooler if we passed the job around? What about Prairie Dog Day? No, that probably wouldn't work due to a prairie dog's inability to remain in one place for longer than 4 and a half seconds. They are also a little too vocal. I'm having visions of a bunch of old dudes in top hats yipping away as little Woonsocket Willie pops his head up, sees a bunch of creepy dudes in tophats and immediately ducks back down into his underground lair never to be seen or heard from again. Do groundhogs even make any sounds? I'm just askin'.

Maybe we could institute a national holiday and call it Weasel Day. Now, before you tell me to step off and leave those furry little wonders of nature alone, I was actually thinking about something entirely different.

Hear me out -

Every year we all gather at the steps of the capitol in D.C. and wait for the weasels to come out to see whether we are in for six more weeks of being told one thing and experiencing another.

Sound good?

I guess we can stick with what we've got. It seems to be working.


Ben O.

BTW - We simply have to come up with a cool hip-hop nickname for that poor groundhog. Something like "P Groundie" or "14 cents" or something. I just feel sorry for the lil' guy going through life with the name Punxsutawney Phil.